Column: Gus Bode’s top ten ways to survive unofficial Halloween

By Emily Cooper and Gus Bode, Staff Reporters

This weekend, SIU’s unofficial halloween. Bars. Houses. Drinks. Half-assed costumes with clever backstories.  

While some of us are going to stay in until noon from hangovers or ignoring their roommates that can’t hold their alcohol, some will also be planning smart ways to keep partying.

Here are top ten ways to survive unofficial, since hopefully that’s part of your plan.

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1. Dress in a Halloween costume

Make it creative, fun, and comfortable. There’s going to be a long night ahead of you, so you don’t want something that jabs, tugs, or makes you sweat a lot.

You don’t need a huge amount of effort, you can even reuse Halloween costumes from previous years. Several individuals at the bars will do the same. It’s easy to spot.

Even if you just tape a bag of Lays to your shoulder, it’s at least a conversation piece. This weekend isn’t just about drinking — so don’t be the weak link of a party.

(Editor’s note: If you don’t like that costume idea, you might have a chip on your shoulder.)

2. Don’t drink jungle juice

Morons make this. This amalgam of liquors and poor choices made at parties is a quick way to get alcohol poisoning.

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Yeah, it’s a quick way to get drunk, but it’s also a gross one. Why drink just to get drunk when you could be enjoying the path to it also?

3. Water! Water! Water!

H2O will be your best friend these next couple of days, so stock up now while the local Kroger has them on sale.

You can just bring water to the places you go, pack some in the car, or make sure to ask for some from the parties and bars.

4. Do your homework

Plan for a weekend of chaos, so finish all your homework as soon as possible so you can enjoy this weekend.

When you’re going to wake up barely remembering what superhero you dressed as the previous night, you really don’t want to have something due with that headache in the way.

5. Grab a friend, or a few

Invite friends! You want to experience this weekend together, because you can drink alone every other day of the week.

There’s nothing quite like a good memory, but no one to share it with. Better yet, you might remember how none of you remember the night before.

(Editor’s note: I can barely keep track sober. What week are we on? …Wait, what midterms?)

Always walk in pairs, if not groups. This will ensure safety out on the streets of the Dirty Dale.

6. Don’t drink and drive

If you’re of age, drink responsibly. Leave the car keys on the table if you’re going to drink, or give your keys to someone else.

(Editor’s note: Sorry, no joke here. Please don’t die.)

7. Don’t forget your ID at home

If anything else being extra prepared for the worse case scenarios is best. Well, better than being like a deer in headlights when the cops stop you.

8. Keep your friends in the loop

Whether you’re splitting up the group, getting lucky, or just need to go home, send your friends your location prior.

Safety first and knowing the location of your friends will help save a headache or two in case of an emergency.

9. Pack a punch

There’s still a lot of freaks, creeps and predators out on unofficial Halloween, costumed or not.

Pepper spray is a key accessory. Fasten that small savior to your pants, so there’s no excuse for losing it.

It’s guilt-free if you hit someone with it, but we recommend using the actual spray instead.

10. It goes without saying, but relax

Have fun, this is time to let loose and enjoy a weekend away from the stress of classes while only having to travel around to the closest streets to you.

Having a safe, responsible, yet fun unofficial will make this stressful semester worth it.

(Editor’s note: Funofficial? Yeah yeah, I’ll leave.)

We’re not only paying for our education but also the experiences with it. So go out and have fun.

Staff reporter Emily Cooper can be reached at ecooper@dailyegyptian.com or on Twitter at @ecooper212.

Staff drunk Gus Bode can be reached at [email protected], assuming he’s over his hangover.

To stay up to date with all your southern Illinois news, follow the Daily Egyptian on Facebook and Twitter.

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