The line between pain and pleasure is drawn by mutual consent. 

BDSM— or bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism and masochism—is becoming a widely discussed topic after the release of “Fifty Shades of Grey” on Feb. 13.

The movie depicts college student Anastasia Steele’s erotic awakening at the hands of billionaire Christian Grey. Steele is introduced to Grey’s world of control and sexual deviance in this unconventional love story.

However, “Fifty Shades of Grey” fails to represent some of the most vital aspects of alternative sexual practices.

Simon Blackfell, a longtime member of the BDSM community, said the film barely scratches the surface of the intricate process.

“What you see is the activity, not the thought behind it,” he said.

Blackfell, a graduate student in psychology from Bloomington, is an advocate for BDSM practices. He is hosting an event at 6 p.m. Thursday at the Gaia House to teach people about the lifestyle.

“I’m not dissing ‘Fifty Shades of Grey,’” he said. “I’m doing this to make sure people are getting the proper information about how [BDSM] works in the real world.”

Blackfell said many aspects of BDSM are not explored in the movie. Because of this, he warned people not to apply “Fifty Shades” directly to reality.

“There’s a large amount of safety that needs to be in place, and there’s a long list of consensual activity that goes on,” he said.

One recent example of a lack of consent and safety was the interaction between two University of Illinois at Chicago students on Feb. 24, according to the Chicago Tribune.

Mohammad Hossain, a UIC freshman, was charged with sexual assault of a female student in what he said was a re-enactment of scenes from “Fifty Shades of Grey.”

Hossain bound the 19-year-old’s hands to a bedpost with a belt, used another belt to bind her legs, gagged her with a necktie and covered her eyes with knit cap.

He removed the woman’s clothing and began striking her with a belt. After hitting her several times, she told Hossain to stop as she shook her head and cried.

Hossain continued striking the woman. She freed her arms, but he then held them behind her back and sexually assaulted her as she continually asked him to stop.

Blackfell said the movie does not properly cover negotiations, safe words or getting consent. 

The precautions of BDSM are not the only things lost in translation.

James Ferraro, a physiology professor with research interest in sexual behavior, said the definition of BDSM is misunderstood as well.

“A lot of the story does not follow what true BDSM is,” he said. “The whole area deals with consensual power exchange.”

Blackwell said BDSM is not always sexual and can range from light biting and spanking to full bondage and latex.

“Say the dominant [person] likes the submissive [person] to always walk on their left-hand side,” he said. “That’s a power exchange, but not a sadomasochistic one. There is no pain or punishment.”

BDSM is also not just about physicality.

Ferraro said kink-based relationships foster a heightened sense of communication.

“Most people who engage ‘vanilla sex’ don’t say things like, ‘Now we’re going to do missionary, if that’s OK with you,’ or, ‘Now we’re going to do a little oral,’ and then afterwards say, ‘So how was that for you?’” he said.

BDSM requires constant verbal articulation, providing an added layer of intimacy not demonstrated in the movie, Ferraro said.

He said a common misconception of BDSM is that it stems from past abuse. He said the stereotype is evident in “Fifty Shades” because Grey was exposed to the activity at a younger age by an older companion.

“Whoever’s generating the material is trying to make it a mainstream story,” Ferraro said. “The first thing they have to do is pathologize the characters. That makes it more comfortable for the general public to watch.”

He said thinking of characters as damaged helps people rationalize a taboo subject.

BDSM’s forbidden nature, however, can be one of its most irresistible allures.

Early childhood experiences that resonate throughout adulthood can play a major role in kink, said Chris Weinke, a sociology professor with a partial focus on sexuality.

Fetishism—the sexual arousal a person receives from a certain item or situation—can sometimes be a learned behavior in both positive and negative contexts according to two separate theories, he said.

“Maybe a little boy’s babysitter accidentally touches him in his genital area with her shoe, he becomes aroused and then develops some kind of connection between shoes and arousal,” he said.

An act’s strong association with guilt or shame is equally as powerful.

“A child tries on his mother’s clothing out of curiosity, and maybe she catches him wearing her dresses or lingerie and scolds him,” Weinke said.

The child then identifies the object or situation as taboo, he said. It becomes exotic, mysterious and tempting.

Blackfell said that is not always the case, though.

“People assume anything involving this world is in negative context or there’s some deep psychological issue involved,” he said. “There’s plenty of well-adjusted people who just enjoy these activities.”

He said a BDSM lifestyle is more common than some people may think.

“There’s this myth that those people are weirdos or perverts when they’re just the same people we interact with every day and never realize it,” Blackfell said.

Blackfell’s presentation, “Clear up the Shades of Grey,” is free and will be held at the interfaith center located at 913 S. Illinois Ave. in Carbondale.