Blog Wars: Create own triathlon

By Gus Bode

The ‘Rec Your Body’ triathalon continued this year at the Recreation Center with a diverse variety of participants. If you could construct your own triathlon of three events, what would they be?

Scott Mieszala

I’d begin with a basketball half-court shot contest. No joke, I’m confident I could go toe-to-toe in a half-court shot contest with even some NBA players, and I’d be willing to test this theory and take on any challenger. After I built a nice advantage with my first event, the triathlon would move to a typing race, because I think I’m a pretty fast typer. (That’s not a real word. I don’t care.) The triathlon would end with a hot dog eating contest, which I would intentionally lose by eating two hot dogs with ketchup and mustard, for three reasons: 1. I’d already have enough of a lead after the first two events that the third would be irrelevant, 2. I’d get some free food out of the deal, 3. While I could smuggle in some ketchup and mustard packets, I couldn’t bring in enough condiments to make Chicago-style hot dogs, and 4. I wouldn’t want a stomachache.


Danny Wenger

I’d start my triathlon with an event at which I excel: making snarky and sarcastic remarks about people walking by. The competitors would stand behind a large window and comment on various, unknowing pedestrians. From there we would have a sandwich building event that involved a wide selections of breads, condiments, deli meats, cheeses and of course some mashed up avocado. There are few things in this world as enjoyable as throwing things like turkey, ham and salami between some honey oat bread slices with some brown mustard, provolone cheese, mayo, salt and pepper, baby spinach and the ultimate condiment, avocado. The last event would be worth 98 percent of the points, making both previous event useless in the final tally and the event would be spelling my middle name. The difficulty is that my middle name is Hawaiian, making me a shoe in for the win.

Luis C. Medina

The triathlon starts with a fried chicken cook-off because everybody who has had a chance to enjoy my famous fried chicken dinner has wanted a second chance to try it out.’ This might be the hardest leg (no pun intended) because we’re talking about preparing, seasoning and then of course cooking the portions in hot oil.’ The second leg is preparing desert. Whether it be cookies, my world-renowned no-bake cheesecake or the oh-so delicious coconut cake, desert is a very important part of the meal. The third and final leg is finally eating the meal.

All while drinking a beverage of your choice (your options grow larger when you’re 21 like me) because it gets hot out there in the kitchen.’ When cooking, I use Miller Lite, sometimes I like to marinate the chicken with beer.

Jeff Engelhardt

The first leg of my triathlon would be a speed bag competition. Yeah, you know the little bag that goes 100 mph when Rocky punches it. Well I can do my fair share of boxing and a lot of people struggle to get the rhythm necessary to have a good session on the speed bag. After that I would move to Guitar Hero. It is one game I dominate with ease. Throw me legendary songs such as ‘Cowboys from Hell,’ ‘Hangar 18’ and ‘Cult of Personality’ and I will shred those up like a potent combination of Eddie Van Halen and Stevie Ray Vaughan. To finish off the ultimate triathlon I would move it to the real instruments. I would throw down on the drums, which I have played since the ripe age of 10 years old. This is a sure win and a fitting ending to my dominating performance.