Spring break in the prairie state

1. Give yourself the ‘spa treatment’

– Even if you’re a guy, it doesn’t make you metrosexual. A good ol’ back wax never hurt anyone. Especially not Robin Williams. But seriously, you can find a spa at any four- – or five- – star hotel in any metro area and in the phone book within driving distance of wherever your hometown may be. Just don’t go crazy with the eyebrow waxing. You’ve seen Whoopi Goldberg, haven’t you?

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2. If you haven’t been to Garden of the Gods – go

– Go back 200 million years and enjoy hiking scenic bluffs atop the Shawnee National Forest, which covers nearly 300,000 acres between the Ohio and Mississippi rivers. But, trust us on this, you’d better watch your step – it’s a long way down. And as a bonus, check out “The Birds of Giant City:A Slide Show” at 10 a.m. Saturday at the Giant City Visitor Center.

3. Watch as many spring training games on television as you possibly can

– Cardinal fan, Cub fan or even, oh my, White Sox fan, it doesn’t matter – Spring Training rules! And if you’ve got a week to do nothing but watch baseball, well, why would you waste it trying to work ahead on your classes? That’s how people fall behind come October. Besides, you’ve got to keep up on those roster changes.

4. If you’re in Chicago, go to the Sears Tower – it’s really tall!

– So what if it’s not the tallest building in the world; the view is still something you’re not going to get in Carbondale. Not even from the top of Pulliam. Historians say you see 40 to 50 miles from the Skydeck on a clear day. Imagine seeing Michigan, Indiana, Illinois and Wisconsin – at the same time! And we’re not even going to get started on the Windy City’s architecture (especially not the “new” Soldier Field). It’s open until 10 nightly, too.

5. Seen the St. Louis Zoo lately? Neither have we.

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– Really, when’s the last time you stared down a penguin? A panther? An elephant, maybe? Unless you’re Jane Goodall, we’re guessing it’s been a while. Why not primp up your primate knowledge with a trip to the St. Louis Zoo, continually voted one of the top five zoos in the nation? Did we mention it’s just across the state line? Or that they’ve got more than 6,000 animals and some really cool statues? And it’s almost entirely outdoors. That means no freezing your butt off inside some arctic museum.

6. Start a garden – seriously

– No “Garden State” puns, please. Yes, it was a good movie, but we’re talking about the real thing here, not some Natalie Portman flick. Think it’ll be too time-consuming? Think again. Most beds need only about 90 minutes of maintenance per week – depending on climate and weather conditions. And if you’re at home, you can always start it and then leave the rest to your parents, like you did with that pet fish “what’s-his-name.”

7. See a concert while everyone else is away

– Ever been crushed in a mosh pit? Yeah, us too. That’s why spring break is the ultimate time to see a concert:because everyone is gone. Live near Champaign? See Stroke 9 March 18 at the Canopy Club. Nestled near the St. Louis area? The Used and My Chemical Romance are at The Pageant March 13 and 14. From Chicago like everyone else in Carbondale? Rusted Root is at the House of Blues March 16. They were on the “Ice Age” soundtrack, by the way.

8. Watch the Salukis in the NCAA Tournament

– Where will they be playing? Last we heard, the pundits were putting us in Worcester, Mass., against Notre Dame. But who cares where we are, anyway? The point is that we’re there – for the fourth year in a row. And it’s a safe bet we’ll be anywhere from a four seed (wishful thinking) and an eight. What’s that mean? It means we’ll be there at least until the second round.

9. Nevermind that – drive to see the Salukis in the NCAA Tournament

– We were just kidding about that whole Worcester thing. They wouldn’t really exile us to the East Coast, would they? We think not. We’re banking on Indianapolis or Chicago with a possible match-up with the Fighting Illini looming in the not-so-distance future. The games begin March 17, and tickets will be available online as soon as the brackets are unveiled Sunday.

– That’s right – study. It won’t kill you. Oh, wait a second; it’s spring break, isn’t it? Never mind.