“When you have someone trying to shove pills down your throat and threatening to kill you with a sawed-off shotgun, yeah, you are going to have nightmares,” Marlene Mezo said.

Every night this week at 3:00 a.m. Marlene has woken up from a dream or nightmare with her ex-husband in it.

“I’ve been out four years, but I still have nightmares,” she said. “I can’t quite figure it out. I’ll probably be dealing with this my whole life.”

Marlene Mezo was married for 21 years before she decided to leave her husband. She said he never laid a hand on her, but when she walked out she felt beaten. Her ex-husband did not pursue her after she left, because he quickly found someone else. Marlene left on July 6. Their anniversary would have been the next day. On July 7 she felt the need to call him to wish him a happy anniversary.

“When I called, he picked up the phone and told me he didn’t have time to talk because he was with somebody else,” Marlene said. “I was the first person he married. I always told people I never had to worry about him messing around or cheating on me because he was so shy.”

During her marriage, Marlene was told she was worthless, stupid, and unable to make it on her own.

 “Just because you don’t see a black eye, just because you don’t see a bruise, doesn’t mean that we aren’t suffering,” she said. “I think a lot of people think we deserve what happens to us, but that’s not true. No one deserves to be abused.”

Marlene wants to break the cycle. After she left her husband, she started attending college with hopes of one day opening a women’s center, but her plans have changed. When she graduates in December, she wants to be a motivational speaker, especially to high school girls.

“The signs of emotional abuse are a lot different than the physical, it’s a lot easier to get sucked in,” Marlene said.

Aidan Osborne can be reached at [email protected]